  POORLY WORDED ADS
  
  2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect 
  markings, 555-1234.  Leave mess.
  
  Lost: small apricot poodle.  Reward.  Neutered.  Like 
  one of the family.
  
  A superb and inexpensive restaurant.  Fine food 
  expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
  
  Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; 
  Children $2.00.
  
  For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick 
  legs and large drawers.
  
  Four-poster bed, 101 years old.  Perfect for antique 
  lover.
  
  Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an 
  extra pair to take home, too.
  
  Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in 
  factory.
  
  Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce 
  at night.
  
  We do not tear your clothing with machinery.  We do it 
  carefully by hand.
  
  For Sale.  Three canaries of undermined sex.
  
  For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an 
  Alaskan Hussy.
  
  Great Dames for sale.
  
  Have several very old dresses from grandmother in 
  beautiful condition.
  
  Tired of cleaning yourself?  Let me do it.
  
  Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
  
  Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
  
  If you think you've seen everything in Paris, visit the 
  Pere Lachasis Cemetery.  It boasts such immortals as 
  Moliere, Jean de la Fontain, and Chopin.
  
  Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the 
  Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink 
  it all in.
  
  The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, 
  comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.
  
  Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
  
  Toaster: A gift that every member of the family 
  appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
  
  Sheer stockings.  Designed for fancy dress, but so 
  serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.
  
  Stock up and save.  Limit: one.
  
  We build bodies that last a lifetime.
  
  For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
  
  Man, honest.  Will take anything.
  
  Man wanted to work in dynamite factory.  Must be 
  willing to travel.
  
  UsedCars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated?  Come here 
  first!
  
  Christmas tag-sale.  Handmade gifts for the 
  hard-to-find person.
  
  Modular Sofas.  Only $299.  For rest or fore play.
  
  Wanted: Hair-cutter.  Excellent growth potential.
  
  Wanted.  Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or 
  drink.
  
  3-year-old teacher need for pre-school.  Experience 
  preferred.
  
  Our experienced Mom will care for your child.  Fenced 
  yard, meals, and smacks included.
  
  Our bikinis are exciting.  They are simply the tops.
  
  Auto Repair Service.  Free pick-up and delivery.  Try 
  us once, you'll never go anywhere again.
  
  Holcross pullets.  Starting to lay Betty Clayton, 
  Granite 5-6204.
  
  Illiterate?  Write today for free help.
  
  Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head 
  illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
  
  Wanted.  Widower with school-age children requires 
  person to assume general housekeeping duties.  Must be capable of 
  contributing to growth of family.
  
  Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round 
  bottom for efficient beating.
  
  Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
  
  And now, the Superstore--unequaled in size, unmatched 
  in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
  
  We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in 
  your home
  
  for $1.00.
  
  
