blectum from blechdom
by goat
vitals>
name: Kevin Blechdom and Blevin Blectum
age: 23 30
hometown: Stuart, Florida sebastopol, ca
favorite cuss word: bitchhole lame-ass
ideal romantic evening: studio sex
gluing my ass to a barstool (in the comfort of my own home)
favorite african country: ghana
Nigeria's Kano State although there is some trouble with invasions of queelas
star wars or thx1138:
whats a thx1138?
haven't seen thx1138 - empire strikes back is slightly less lame than star wars, if i was forced to pick, and to continue the food chain, the dr who episode in which adric gets killed off is slightly less lame than empire strikes back.
intro>
we all have our defining moments in life, when something elusive becomes obvious and figurative boners ensue. if you were a white teenage male living in the mid to late 80's, it was most asuredly discovering heavy metal a la iron maiden or megadeth, or in my case, anthrax, or messing with the inner workings of walkmans or the family stereo. if you were a girl, i'm not sure what yr great discoverys were, maybe learning that boys actually ARE retarded, i dunno. as you blossomed into a young worldly flower during high school and college, you discovered that there was a whole universe of delicious strangeness that was up to then only hinted at by the odd clothing and sleep habits of older sibblings...perhaps you saw "plan 9 from outer space" or "heavy metal parking lot", maybe you studied modern art and it made sense, or quite possibly it was the first time you were lulled by the sweet sweetnesses of one richard james.
one of my defining moments was hearing bfb, after a few listens their silliness made me a believer, and it was like "caught in a mosh" take two, or "garage days revisted" revisited. yeah. so the idea of forwarding them some questions seemed rad, this is what i asked and what the sassy lassies answered. if you havent heard their music yet(!!!???) then you can go dl a crapload of free tunes here while reading the following goodness. rock-a-mallard ago go, yo!
who listens to bfb and where do they fit in in God's plan (aka the food chain)?
i don't know, we do, and people we know do, and i think some other people do.
the only ones I know of fit into the plan by giving birth to a fake octopus and then dancing around with it
what pushes bfb 2 b the best bfb can b ?
our volatile relationship helps, lots of fighting and conflicts to work through in the music.
my part in bfb exists solely as partial fulfillment of my drive to keep busy
in a perfect world, artists are no longer: a. poor, b. content providers, or c. around ?
C around, but the problem is that a perfect world can't be perfect or else it wouldn't be perfect so the question is impossible to answer.
b. and they would have a puppy
bfb's output is decidedly unique, is bfb's music absurd?
yes, but i think we're getting over that.
yes, moreso as we go along
what does bfb concider absurd?
working fulltime in a cubicle in front of a computer at walmart.com - visit http://www.walmart.com (i did the NSync shop)
all of this stuff and the past year
was/is bfb influenced by the dadist art movement? if not, please accept my most humble apologies for using the word art twice so far.
well, the good thing about art, is that it rhymes with fart. We're influenced by lots of different stuff....... I used to imagine living in surreallier a world that might be fun...like having everything around and everyone around, just a little OFF, a bit wrong in the wrong places, just like changing the proportions of what is around... BUT NOW, I just wanna sing really loud. I just want to FEEL stuff... not so much distort stuff away from how it is... just feel things the way they are, and also feel things together with other people.
no, although we sometimes use urinals
what sounds cooler: new rock or rock nuevo? is bfb (the) new rock?
Is meatloaf rock? I thought rage rock was the new rock. I think we're the new spoilt girls that do whatever they want, except we don't know what we want, so i guess we're the new nothing.
rock shmock cooler schmooler i mean no
would the ideal bfb concert include fireworks? if so, what else? if not, then what?
yes, but not explosive fireworks...the lovey first kiss kind of fireworks.
a firecracker going off, which makes a snaus slipping on a banana peel and landing on a mallard
micheal jackson and aphex twin both have new albums : who is the better dancer? jacko or the cuddly bears?
micheal jackson
I am the better dancer
if bfb won the lottery tomarrow (the good, money kind, not the kind in logan's run) would bfb hang up their laptops?
no, but i'd probably upgrade to a couple G4 laptops and a real working integrated circuit coffee table. Maybe get someone to design an interface for playing that makes the digital music making process more effective... so we can put more "real time" emotions, the sappy girly kind of emotions, the frustrated struggling artist kind of emotions, the rejected ugly teenager kind of emotions, and the sexually frustrated kind of emotions - directly into the bodies and minds of listeners, and then people won't have to feel so alone, and can realize that we're just as fucked up, except we won the lottery and got this really cool instrument, therefore they are required to listen to our emotions and be influenced by our emotions and attempt to replicate our emotions and since we have the best method of transferring these feelings from our bodies into other peoples bodies, and other musicians who add their own tiny "influence" into the musical emotional pot, those musicians will be limited by their lack of an amazing instrument, and our feelings of frustration and distrust will dominate all the other feelings around the world and even though we'll be on top, we will still be greedy and jealous. This will enable us to be more likely to find "more-evolved" sexual partners and in which case we will be able to fertilize our popular eggs with higher quality dna and therefore produce more-dominant offspring, children more likely to survive, and then, when the boat is sinking, and only 7 of the 3,000,000 humans will be saved from firey brutal death, to be taken away to the happy pretty land, our children will be one of those 7, and therefore our genes and our dna and our feelings will continue on forevermore while everyone elses will just die away into nothing.
HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE NOTHING!?!
Does putting an imac on my lap count as a laptop? I would get 1000 more dr samples glued together into some sort of 'sampladelic' scarf / sash. sure, when I win the lotto or when I bet a lot of money on 'whirl win' and he wins, I will get a laptop and quit this lame-ass toy factory job but to answer your question no i would still keep beating the dead horse music cause I like to beat it up without caring fuck-all for famefortunegreedslatherylameassgettingjockedby formindcontrolling distrustingr eallybitcholesinbunchesallthetimewhocares.
a bfb live experience can be summed up as: a. explosive , or b. implosive ? explain.
predicatably unpredictable. Sometimes a sloppy mess with hardly any direction. 90% we get into a fight before we play, the other 10% we're really drunk and don't care. Or there's a chance we rock. We don't sync up our beats with any MIDI or anything, so most likely there'll be some unsynced chaos, and we aren't very good at eq-ing in live settings, or in studio settings for that matter, so most likely everything will seem off balance and wrong, and we don't do much to fix the problem, instead we pretend like "we meant to do that", our favorite excuse (and common from electronic female musicians too lazy to learn how to make good electronic music) is to "oh yeah shitty music, that's our AESTHETIC." And all i have to say is that thats all behind us now... thank god.
neither a nor b but solid like a miniature-train-ride adventure to an unexplained destination in a chaotic way and very fun (and extremely danceable)
what period in the carreer of bfb is commonly regarded as the most regrettable?
right now.
I dunno about commonly, but I would say the most regrettable period is the one in which I get blamed for everything about bfb sucking
in bfb's opinon, when will/did the aliens land?
i don't know, maybe when everyone started taking too much ecstasy, they thought that would be a good time, cuz we'd be more "mentally-enhanced" and then we'd be able to understand them better and maybe communicate psychically.
aliens are, like, SO crying schwa, so 90s, so mission to mars, I can't believe you're still harping on them.
what musical bounderies are left to be poked and pummled by bfb?
to be poked and pummled, you mean what bounderies have we kept and are now going to cross over. Damn that's a hard question. I don't know. I don't think i can think about it like that right now. I think i could have answered this better before we had anything released
your moms left buttcheek, to break up all the cellulite {goat note: my mother was left with horrible burns over 80% of her body when she was caught in a sudden gas explosion at her jenny craig weigh station, so cracks about her weight aren't as funny anymore...syke}
what five albums (excluding family picture albums) could bfb not live without?
tina turner,Bauhaus (the BBC one),the Shaggs,Kramer's live record from somewhere in europe,Patty Duke
i dunno more like tracks than albums some always some this-week the first track on black dog: bytes; yello: you gotta say yes to another excess; the video for bjorks 'bachelorette'; the 'it's them' track by Them; most of LFO 'frequencies'
i live near a firestation.
cool
well, on my way to work today there was a fire department blockade 'fill the boot' campaign at one of the stoplights- so you can put money in the authentic fireman's booty they hold up to the car window. I mean boot.
who stands to make the most bling from bfb's genius?
hopefully we do.
ya, us
if bfb were a mode of transportation, what would it be?
a merry-go-round
lopsided elephant with saddle, or brokedown cowboy horse without saddle
and lastly, 30 years from now when we're all dead and gone and the world is over run by ultra intelligent atm's, what lingering reminder of bfb's once great greatness would bfb wish the world to have?
our giant tits.
no desire to linger on here even tits-wise
bfb themselves advise everyone to visit these sites or "else"
-> walmart & coat of blevin
blectum from blechdom website